I found Muhammad! At YouTube, no less! And now, for a limited time, you can “ASK MO!”
I am the glorious messenger of Allah (swt), the Bobblehead Prophet Mo (peace be upon me).
Our great creator has given me the opportunity to return to earth as a Bobblehead via YouTube to answer all your questions!
Ask any questions about Islam. All participants will remain anonymous.
Q: You are not the real Muhammad (pbuh). How dare you pretend to be the Prophet (pbuh).
~Uli bin Al-Sahyd, 9945 W Vernor Hwy, Dearborn, Mich.A: That isn’t really a question, but I shall answer anyway. Do you think I, the great and noble Prophet Muhammad (pbum) wanted to return to earth as a lowly Bobblehead? If it were my choice, I would have returned in a body like Brad Pitt’s. But Allah (swt) has his reasons, and I am not one to question the great and most compassionate Allah (swt). But it appears you think you are!
Q: You son of a bitch! You said this was anonymous!
~Uli bin Al-Sahyd, 9945 W Vernor Hwy, Dearborn, Mich.A: Forgive me, brother. It won’t happen again.
Q: Praise be to Allah (swt) and His Prophet Muhammad (pbuh). I am a peaceful Muslim, but it seems the Qur’an would encourage me to kill people who have done no wrong. I am uncertain as to whether or not it is right to harm another without just cause. What do you think I should do?
~A Concerned MuslimA: A very important question you ask, brother. I, Muhammad (pbum), wrote the Qur’an 1400 years ago during a time of war. Most verses reflect this difficult time in Islamic history, and were never meant to be taken literally in this day and age. You should not harm your fellow humans, except in self-defense. (ill-kay the infidel-ays)
Q: Heya sexy! I’m a very cute single woman looking for a bit of casual fun. I’m smart, adventurous and outgoing. I also love singing karaoke and going out to bars. I hope you’re still single? or at least available for dating. I won’t disappoint. If you’re interested, get back to me, but don’t reply directly to this message. Btw, I’m presently using my best friend’s account, I wasn’t sure I wanted to do this whole online hook-up thing. So please send your e-mail at my personal address, mccornicklkate@yahoo. Have a great day and thanks. P.S. Ask me about my hidden tattoo!
~EveA: Infidel whore, the only question you asked is if I am single. No. I have many wives, though all are currently in paradise serving other magnificent martyrs. I do not care about your hidden tattoo. In my time, “smart, adventurous and outgoing” women such as yourself would have been buried up to her shoulders and pummeled with heavy stones until her death. That most just and merciful punishment is Allah’s (swt) law. Had mankind not strayed from his most perfect path, you would surely meet that same fate. Peace be with you.
Q: Hey Bobble Head. Hope all is well, I have 2 questons: 1, is it true that people who perform Jihad get 72 Virgins? And 2, do you think my camel is sexy?
~BRA: 1, No, the 72 virgin myth is not true. Actually, Muslims who die fighting for Islam will receive the MINIMUM of 72 virgins. Depending on the number of infidels they kill, a martyr could earn hundreds of virgins, including young boys. The most magnificent martyrs (like myself, pbum) will have 72 mansions, each containing 72 beds, and each bed containing 72 virgins, for a total of 373,248 sexy babes to shtook (I’ve done it in one night, Insha’allah!). 2, Yes, a very sexy camel. Though, it might have to be stoned for being unchaste.
Q: Is it a sin to laugh at you pbuy?
~EDA: Yes, it is. For such a sin, you will be spending eternity in comedic hell where you’ll be forced to watch Carrot Top perform in a cage of hungry tigers. Your torment will be that he never gets eaten.
Tags: bobblehead, mo, muhammad, Youtube
