As we are enjoying our long weekend, it is once again that wonderful time and I have found a discussion that couldn’t be more appropriate for a blog by Rabbi Kalman Packouz of Aish Ha’Torah. Enjoy!
One of the distinguishing features of human beings from other species is that we can talk, and one of the distinguishing features amongst human beings is how we use the gift of speech. Do we speak in an elevated manner or in a crass manner? They way we speak says a lot about us – who we are, how we perceive ourselves, who we identify with.
The Torah teaches that human beings were created in the image of God (Genesis 1:27). Since God has no corporeal image, the Torah is telling us that we were created in a spiritual image of the Almighty – that we can emulate the Almighty in doing kindness and that we can use speech to perfect this world.
Many times people are not aware of how they speak. Use of curse words demeans the speaker who, after all, should look upon him/herself as a holy individual created in the image of the Almighty!
Also, people need to be aware of how they use speech when talking with someone or about someone. Loshon hora (literally, “evil speech”) is derogatory speech and is forbidden by Jewish law even when it’s true – unless there is a compelling requirement to share the information. Loshon hora is the fuel for hatred, jealousy and contention. It can break an engagement, end a marriage, destroy a partnership, ruin a life. However, proper speech can bring harmony and build relationships. Words can hurt, words can heal.
King David’s wrote in Psalms 34:12-14, “Who is the one who desires life …? Guard your tongue from evil and your lips from speaking deceit.”
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[What are some of the major reasons] people speak … derogatory speech? A Jewish Sage and expert on the subject enumerated 7 basic reasons: (1) Anger – losing control. (2) Joking – seeking a laugh no matter who the joke hurts. (3) Arrogance – to aggrandize oneself at the expense of others. (4) Giving up hope – thinking that it is impossible not to speak loshon hora. (5) Seeing that others aren’t careful – following the bad example of others. (6) Judging others unfavorably – we tend to see the negativity in others that we have in ourselves. (7) Ignorance – not knowing the laws governing proper speech.
If we understand what motivates us to speak poorly of others, we can correct our ways in order to speak properly.
POSITIVE SPEECH
- 1. Do not express damaging or derogatory information about someone that might cause him physical, psychological or financial harm, even if it is true and deserved.
- 2. Promote people’s well being. When in doubt, don’t speak out.
- 3..Humor is great, but make sure jokes aren’t at someone else’s expense.
- 4. Be kind to yourself. Speaking badly even about yourself is unethical.
- 5. Don’t listen to gossip. If you can’t change the direction of the conversation, it is advisable to leave.
- 6. If you inadvertently hear damaging information, you should believe that it is NOT true.
- 7. Always give others the benefit of the doubt and focus on the positive.
- 8. Words once spoken can’t be erased. Think before you speak, especially if you are angry, hurt or jealous.
- 9. Use kind and supportive words with your children and spouse whenever possible. Harsh words can cause irreparable harm as can speaking derogatorily to others about the ones you love most.
- 10. It is not only permitted, but required, to warn a person about potential harm – for example, that a potential business partner has a repeated record of embezzlement.
For more on this subject.
What we say, (and don’t say) has a major impact on our relationships and our words are the ambassadors of our souls. We are often told in the real world that “we are what we eat” but in the blog world is more appropriate to realize that – you are what you say!
Everyone have a meaningful weekend, a blessed “new year” and for those Jews who take the opportunity to keep the life-multiplyer of Shabbat – Shabbat Shalom!
As an added bonus, a discussion of End of Days – The Jewish Perspective. See below the fold for this discussion.
In the past many have shown an interest in the Jewish understanding of the “End of Days”, and the Moshiach. Although I have often attempted to avoid this conversation, as I am not knowledgeable enough to really discuss it fully, it is a part of this weeks Torah portion (Jews read a portion of the Torah each week) and thus this is as good an opportunity to delve into it as any.
Vayechi (Genesis 47:28-50:26)
The End of Days[This weeks Torah includes] Jacob, on his deathbed, [telling] his sons that he is going to reveal how and when the Messiah will come. All wait with baited breath to hear him reveal the future. But then, in a staggering anti-climax, all Jacob does is give a different blessing to each of his sons. He explains to them their strengths and weaknesses, and never mentions the Messiah again.
The [Jewish] Sages explain that while Jacob was eager to tell his sons when the Messiah would come, God did not allow him to do so…[There might have also been another reason for this]
In giving his children blessings, Jacob was in fact explaining how and when the Messiah would come about.
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The Jewish concept of the Messiah is that we ourselves must bring him about. He is not imposed upon the world by God, but arrived at by humanity. It is not a magical, God-guided, radical departure from the direction of history, but rather a development of history itself. The world itself must arrive at perfection, and then God will send the Messiah to solidify that state of being.
Thus, through blessing his children, Jacob was explaining the powers that each of them possessed to help contribute toward perfecting the world. How and when will the Messiah come about? When each of you uses your potential to its fullest in order to make it come about.
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There is always the possibility of God’s intervention. But if God must make it happen Himself, then humanity will have failed. If the human race is to succeed, then Tikkun Olam, perfecting the world, must be our primary focus. And there is really no in-between. We can bring our world to perfection, or allow it to self-destruction.
Jacob told his sons: You have the power, now you just need the will. The same is true for us today.
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The Messianic Era: world peace, brotherhood of man. It’s lovely rhetoric, but…[i]s God really just going to send this guy on a white donkey one day and suddenly everything will be sorted out? That seems naive and wishful thinking.
In this week’s Torah portion, Jacob prophesies the date of the Messianic Era. He is not, however, permitted to tell his children. Why? Surely, there could be nothing more encouraging for the Jewish people throughout the ages than if we were to know there was a set time at which things would turn around. Why not give us that hope?
The point is that we Jews do not look at the Messianic era as something supernatural that God will impose upon the world. Rather, it is an ideal toward which the world must strive. We were given an imperfect world in order to perfect it. It’s all too easy to blame God for the world’s problems [and] it’s human nature to shift the blame to others. The truth is, however, that for the vast majority of the horrors, we have only ourselves to blame.
We human beings are so concerned for with our own lives and our own worries that rarely do we bother to think about what can be done to perfect the world around us...
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Jacob could not give us a date because once a date is given, it is no longer in our hands. And Judaism says that it is entirely within our hands. The Messianic age is ours to create, not just to sit around and wait for….
In the really most basic, this is the Jewish concept of The End of Days, and Moshiach. The question then comes down to what it means to “Tikkun Olam” (heal the world)
Discuss!
Tags: End of Days, Judaism, lashon hara, Moshiach, Open thread, Shabbat, speech
