There’s a rule at my house. If the Patriots are in the Super Bowl, we don’t have a Par-Tay. This year will of course be an exception, because as a die-hard Saints fan, I want to watch Brady and crew wipe that self-satisfied smile off Jared Goff’s face. And for me to say that about an ex-Cal quarterback is indicative of how much of a grudge I’m still holding about that non-call two weeks ago. But enough about that. There’s nothing to be done at this stage, but I will be attired in my Brees jersey to remind the officials who can’t view it that I know who SHOULD be the starting quarterback for the NFC…..(yeah, Bitter, party of one….)

However, I can’t help but make a few observations before the Big Game:

1.   Super Bowl LIII. Okay, no offense, but I think it’s time the NFL quit using the Roman Numerals. Super Bowl 50 used the Arabics (which I remember with distinct clarity because I had a ringside seat to that extravaganza in San Francisco), and then reverted to Romans the year after. Come ON, “LIII” looks silly. And really, this is the only sport that does it. On the first Saturday in May, it’s not going to be the CXLVth running of the Kentucky Derby or the LXIst running of the Daytona 500 in February. Ditch the pretense, NFL. It’s Super Bowl 53. [And that goes for the effing iPhone too. It’s the iPhone 10].

2.   Does any sporting event need a pre-game warm up show that is twice as long as the actual broadcast sporting event?  And do we really need a personal segment on every single player that will be walking on the field?  Outside of their immediate family no.one.cares.   Of course, there will be the obligatory interview with the President of the United States because nothing says “major sporting event” like a politically charged interview.   I did notice that they’ve started to do the same thing with the Triple Crown on NBC.  Four hours leadup to two minutes of racing.  “You know, Tom, entry ‘Can’t Run for Crap’ may be the long shot on this race, but he’s had to endure a life of hardship.  As a young colt, he ran with the wrong crowd until a wise old stallion straightened him out…”   And I imagine that since the game is on CBS, it won’t be the softball interview they did with Obama when he sat down with him.  Drink every time you hear the words “shut down” and “border wall.”  Have an ambulance on standby for possible alcohol poisoning.

3.   The half-time show.  I am so over the half-time show.  After Queen Bey and her “homage” to BLM and the whole “anti-cop” movement (this, of course, after being given a CHP escort with lights and sirens to get her to stadium) and that trifecta from hell of her, Bruno Mars and Cold Play, I vowed to take that opportunity to catch up on my ironing.  Actually I pretty much have done that since that ridiculous wardrobe malfunction of years past.  Well, this year it consists of Maroon 5, Travis Scott and Big Boi.  I’ve HEARD of Maroon 5, don’t know any of their work (or care to) but the other two are apparently rap music artists.  That’s right NFL.  You apparently think the entire viewing audience is comprised of Milennials and Urban Youth.  When you think that in the past, they were able to get Michael Jackson, U2, Paul McCartney (sans Wings), the Rolling Stones and the Who, you have to wonder why the second-rate act booking.  The story I hear is that they’re all still mad at the NFL for not hiring that outstanding quarterback Colin Krapperdick and the Anthem controversy.  You’re not being asked to sing the Anthem, asshats.  By the way, speaking of the Anthem, I am asking for an Act of Congress forbidding Jimmy Buffett from ever singing the Anthem in the SuperDome ever again.  I mean REALLY New Orleans?  The Neville Brothers weren’t available??  I think it’s time to go back to the old half-time shows.  Let’s get those fantastic marching bands from the colleges and watch them with a nice vocal number by someone with a set of pipes.  If you’re stuck grab any contestant from the Masked Singer.

4.   For the guys in the booth, you are NOT on radio.  Believe it or not, the people you are communicating with are able to actually view the action on the field, so please stop telling me what the quarterback is thinking, or what the coach is thinking, or what the cornerback is thinking.  Unless you’re Miss Cleo, you haven’t the foggiest idea what ANYONE on that field is thinking.  For all you know, Gronkowski could be worried that he left the stove on.  However, since Tony Romo has proven himself to be a MOST excellent color man, I am hopeful he’s paired with Jim Nantz, as I think the two of them are the new Madden and Summerall.

5.  The commercials.  Is it just me, or have Super Bowl commercials been a little lacking as of late?  Dear Budweiser:  I don’t want fabulous stories of immigrants.  I want ponies.  I want the Clydes playing football.  I want Mom and Dad Clyde pushing the coach so that baby Clyde thinks he’s all that and a bag of chips.  Bring back the E Trade Baby.  I remember when there was a time when you recorded the game just to watch the commercials later if you missed them).  Now you DVR it so that you can catch the damn missed calls by the referees….(I gotta get over this).

And for a little family note….here is my little Noodles and her Daddy, decked out in their finery for the game:

And if you’re not watching, this is, of course, your open thread for Sunday, so feel free to comment and go off topic right away.  After all, it’s going up at 8:00 a.m., when the pre-game show is starting….