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Okay, um, lessee. You open the sickly dog’s skull, stick his tongue to the roof of his mouth and pour in a bunch of green slime with little tidbits in it. Now the sinuses are loaded. Close the head, and doggy drools infected pus with candies that you try to retrieve with electrified tweezers before they land on his tongue.

But here’s the excellent twist: If you pick the wrong tidbit, you are awarded with 100V of Japanese current coursing through your metacarpals. Hilarity ensues as you roll on the floor convulsing uncontrollably on The Overnight Open Thread.

[Update: More Great Gift Ideas.]